It's Jockey or Nothing!

So goes the line from the Indian TV ad for Jockey men’s underwear.

I know Jockey is an iconic American brand and seek it out in Australia as a viable option to the cheap made in China underwear which is all that’s now available. Even Bonds has thrown in the towel. The brand promoters always maintain that it’s all about production cost, and quality is not compromised but I’m not so sure.

So when the time came to take advantage of really low cost underwear in India I headed to Big Bazaar and snapped up some AFL branded briefs. Must admit I thought this was a pretty cool purchase as I imagined flashing the brand icon to the locals as I watched the Sydney Swans play at the MCG, the home of AFL in Australia. Dream on, as I was the less than happy recipient of the two for the price of three bargain that can only take place in India. I’ve written about this experience on a prior blog.

In need of a reality check I bit the bullet and picked up three pairs of medium sized Jockey briefs, all beautifully boxed and ready to go. No worries I thought, made in India but to a US standard must be what’s going on here. I paid about eight bucks a pair so they weren’t cheap.

Couple of weeks later the Jockey or Nothing tag line has turned into a bit of a joke as all of these mighty purchases have developed little holes. I mean lots of little holes. Checked for bugs, moths, mosquitoes, put out the camphor blocks all to no avail. Maybe it's the production quality? A local lass offers that maybe they were old stock. Interesting explanation?

Fast forward to a week before departure from Manipal and the clothes sorting has been done and dusted. Three pairs of less holey Jockeys are retained, the AFL’s cast aside with other hand me downs for the ”poor people”. I’m rushing to get ready to attend as a judge for the finals of a marketing competition at Manipal University Department of Commerce and searching for a pair of clean Jockeys. Shit they’re all in the washing machine. Shit, what to do?

Well it’s Jockey or Nothing as they say. Mmmm. Memories of Kramer swinging free in that crazy Seinfeld episode. Tight jeans, not sure I can do it. Rummage through the poor box and find the best pair of discarded AFL’s. These black ones will do, quickly slip them on and zip up. Shit, ants in the pants … reverse the process quickly. It’s then that I discover the ants have been making a bee line for the washing line and been feasting on my Jockeys as they dry, hence the holes. Mystery solved but it’s still Jockey or Nothing.